september is looking up.

i made it through the first week alone... but i was never really alone. i have the most amazing friends and the most tolerant room mates ever and i LOVE them. i've cycled through the entire grief process, reverting and settling in at "mildly devastated and confused." i think this is where it stands for a while, and i'm going to accept that. i have other things to worry about...

...like writing a paper for vrooman's class about the effects of color and shot in Judy Garland's 1949 musical, "Meet Me in St. Louis" which i absolutely hated. i just don't care. and its even harder to get motivated to do anything for vrooman since he refuses to give out any marks higher than a 'b' and he only gives 1-2 of those each week. last week just wasn't my week. 3.75/5 points.. sucks.

i used an oil extracting face masque a few days ago and all of the toxins that were sucked out of my skin have manifested themselves all over my face; it has to get worse before it gets better.. but worse is gross as hell. my skin handles stress very poorly... and i've had enough stress. with the whole ryan/jamie thing on top of 3-5 pages due each week for vrooman, 3-5 pages due each week for dr. johnston (which i don't mind much, actually.. her class is fun), worrying about my project for design, the task of trying to figure out what dr. bollinger actually wants us to do for comm. and ID, and annoying emails from the one staff writer that has ever cared flooding my inbox daily, i have as much acne as a high school freshman boy going through puberty. gah.

things are getting better. really, they are. i've stayed busy. wednesday, we went to cowboys and i was drunk. it was a good feeling. emmalee drove me, and i was really excited to get to hang out with her. i like her a lot. her friend, mallory, was really cool too. the mixture of people (courtney--her birthday!, jpitt, cale, tyler, kimmy, cody, em and mal, lana, sketchy dave, leann) was really random, but it ended up being one of the better cowboys adventures i've been on. i'm looking for a repeat this week. friday night brought a soccer party down the street, and our house ended up being (in haby's words) the VIP section. i tend to like the small gatherings of non-vomiting friends that take place in my kitchen. and, haby is right-- our big red couch does add a celeb-section feeling to the house. the rest of the weekend was lazy. i slept a lot and laid around more than i should have. it was great.

kelly is stopping by my parent's house on her way back to TLU, and she's picking up my honey!! i'm so excited. mollie won't know what to do with herself this week, but honey needs the break, and i need my chihuahua. kimmy and sarah are more excited than they're letting on...

i dreamed last night about matt, a guy from sophomore year of high school. i'm not really sure what the dream was about, but i woke up with a smile on my face. i think it was just one of those good memory dreams. it weird though, his face keeps ducking in and out of my memories. hrmm. katy boys... gah.

anyway, just wanted to document that things are looking up. effexor is a good idea for me in times such as these.

here's to a good september.